I've been bad about actually logging exercise in here.

Since my leg is still bugging me (WTF?), I've decided to give myself the week off of running and focus on upper-body strength. (If/when I resume next week, it'll be a walk/hike, not a run/hike, until I'm confident I'm not injured somehow.) This means (for me, at least), sit-ups and push-ups.

Today I managed 40 on-my-knees push-ups and 120 sit-ups in a half an hour. This is certainly much better than I was doing, say, a year ago during my previous attempt at exercise (when I was struggling to do 30/100 in 45-60 min).

I feel like I could've pushed harder today, but due to past rather negative experiences with strength-building, I'm taking that part of it slowly. I don't want to go into heavy mood swings again -- those are just Not Fun.

In other news, I didn't make it to Pride last weekend. :/ (Bad bi boy, I know.) But I did get a fair amount of stuff cleaned up around the apartment.

Also, my fingers are getting worse again. If this trend continues, I'm going in to the doc and asking for physical therapy. And I might need to make some arrangements with work, but we'll see.

Now, off to the shower!

-- Des

For both Monday and Wednesday. I've switched to an MWF schedule, and I'm trying to do stuff in the mornings to see if it makes my day better or worse. (So far, it's neutral.)

Monday was lowering-myself push-ups (so resistance on the down part, no up part), sit-ups, and Albany Hill. Did 10 push-ups, 20 sit-ups, and ran most of the way there and back (say, 40 minutes of active running or hill-climbing). I did quite well, and felt appropriately sore afterward (except for my abs -- I need to work on my sit-up form better, or something).

Wednesday--this morning--wasn't nearly as good. My legs/ankles were complaining of muscle fatigue almost from the start, so I didn't run nearly as much as I did on Monday. I ended up walking half the route home due to soreness. Had similar problems with push-ups, and I still haven't figured out what I need to do for sit-ups.

In short, my body's repair cycle seems to last longer than 48 hours. This does not bode well for doing an every-other-day schedule.

I've been told I need to have a concentrated stretching session on days off. I'll give that a try, but I was already stretching quite a bit yesterday, so I don't know.

-- Des

Didn't push as hard on Albany Hill last night as I usually do, as I haven't exercised in like a week (apart from some easy stuff helping out glaurungs_spawn last weekend). Completed that in maybe an hour, then came home, did maybe 5 attempts at push-ups and sit-ups (hard ones, though -- for push-ups I just lowered myself, kept my muscles engaged and counted to 5), then called it a night.

Thinking I should bump up the planned frequency, as about half the time I only seem to manage to get it done once a week. Maybe just try to do push-ups/sit-ups MWF and running/hiking TR, or vice versa. hmmm.

-- Des

Tuesday: The Prop 8 protest march was on Tuesday, so I used the opportunity to do quite a bit of walking around (net: from work near Embarcadero to the Castro). Didn't time it or anything like that, but kept up a good pace and burned a lot of energy.

Thursday: Relatively quick work-outy-thing at home since (a) I have a lot of other stuff to do, and (b) I kinda screwed up my food schedule, so I didn't have enough energy to push very hard. :/

I hate upper-body work. Hate hate hate.

Did like 40 ... sit-ups? crunches? whatever sit-ups are called when you don't have anything underneath your back at the bottom. Those were interspersed with 60 of a pushup-like motion against a wall (with the angle sufficiently unfavorable so as to force my muscles to do at least some work). High-energy dancing (probably at the level of jogging) at the beginning and end.

The whole thing probably lasted less than a half-hour. Arms are definitely tired, and I never can tell with my abs until the next day.

Also: I started to get a mild headache (which, I've learned, is my body's way of saying "STOP before you get fucked up"). It's food time.

-- Des

Albany Hill.

I punted -- either I started out too quickly, or I just wasn't fully recovered from my run on Tues. By the time I got to Pacific East my ankles/shins were hurting. Since I like not injuring myself, I decided to reduce to a walk and finished the route (up the hill and back down) walking.

Briefly considered making tonight an upper-body night, but honestly, my mood wasn't that great to start with, and punting certainly didn't help. So I'm gonna relax for a bit and get dinner.

On the plus side, I barely broke a sweat climbing the hill. When I first started doing this, I was usually panting by the time I got to the top. So... progress! Whoo! Or something.

I should probably make Tues be running, and Thurs be upper-body, or vice versa. I'm undecided. Eventually, I want to go to Mon-Wed-Fri, or Tues-Thurs-Sun, or something like that... but if today is any indication, that's a ways off yet.

I should start writing about my mental state, as well as my physical state in here again. Seems like I haven't done that in a while. Maybe because things are relatively quiet (or at least stuck) mentally, and the real "struggles" in my life at the moment are physical.

Speaking of which, my finger-joint pain has started to flare up again. I ordered a Kinesis keyboard for work (similar to the one I have at home), and ran around to three different stores today trying to find stress balls that I can squeeze to work the muscles in my hands more. Sadly, none of the stores had them. But I'm starting to get scared that I'm doing, or have done, long-term, permanent damage to myself already, and it's just a matter of falling back and falling back until a couple decades from now (when I'm, say, 40) I can't type anymore.

Call it a product of my mood, but these things worry me sometimes.

-- Des

Quickly, since bedtime is soon.

I skipped last week due to being in a bad (unmotivated) mood.

I did Albany Hill again, and this was the best one yet. 45 minutes of almost constant running/jogging/hiking up a hill, starting from outside my front door, and ending back there again. I think it's also one of my faster (if not the fastest) times for Albany Hill.

Had an energy bar before I left, and a glass of juice when I got back. I'm only just now sitting down to a light dinner (1 egg, with avocado and feta) before I read for a while and then sleep.

My headspace during the session was pretty bad -- going into angry, negative thought loops and dwelling there. But I seemed to recover fairly quickly afterward, and haven't noticed any lingering moodiness.

So I think I can call today a success. =)

-- Des

Went out for a walk this time--nothing strenuous--as I've had a sore throat for the past couple of days and I didn't want to push too hard. While I was out, I kinda felt like I wanted to push harder, but now that I'm back (and tired), I'm glad I didn't.

Went out to Eastshore this time, which is a lot more level than Albany Hill. It's a little... jetty, I guess, that juts out into the bay. So I was able to walk along the water, smell the sea breeze, and generally enjoy the evening. So I'm feeling pretty good, on the whole... sore throat notwithstanding.

I'd forgotten how much I enjoy being near the water. It's very calming, and a different feeling from accomplishing a hill.

It was a nice change.

-- Des

The usual hike/run routine. I think last time went better, but I feel more tired after this one. It was all I could do to drag my butt back from the hill walking. Was also soaked (literally, most of my T-shirt was soaked through) with sweat.

I tried fruit (a banana) last time, so this time I figured I'd try fruit+protein, in the form of Jamba Juice. It wasn't any better -- if anything, it was worse, because I didn't wait long enough and started getting cramps at the beginning. My body definitely responds better to fat and (more) protein, so the adage about drinking juice or Gatorade or whatnot before running just doesn't hold true for me.

The cramps were mild and passed fairly quickly, though. Even still, I was mildly light-headed for most of the trip up until the very end, when exhaustion took over and my brain stopped paying all but the barest attention to what my eyes were seeing.

I ran the latter part of the way out, and the first part of the way back. I dropped back mostly to walking while climbing the hill, as I was already pretty winded by this point, and then ran on the more gentle up/downslopes near the top. As I started running home, I could tell that if I kept pushing myself, I'd be risking moodiness later, so I dropped back to walking a bit before the halfway point.

My running this time was intervals, though -- walk for a couple minutes, then RUN hard until I started hyperventilating. Then slow down and keep walking until my body had made up the oxygen debt, lather, rinse, repeat. If the amount of sweat is any indication, that was a more intense workout, even though it only lasted 25 minutes or so.

I should note that at no point during this or last time did I have to stop and rest. I spent the whole trip moving, which is a good thing.

-- Des

Did Albany Hill again. This time, jogged part of the way there, on and off up the hill, and most of the way back. I didn't keep exact time, but I'm guessing I was probably engaged for a good 35-40min, with occasional short breaks to say hi to cats and avoid getting trampled by deer, humans or other wildlife.

I ate a banana right before leaving work. That really wasn't enough -- I was definitely starting to get light-headed toward the end of the jog. Stopped at Lucky's on the way home to pick up an Odwalla with protein and dinner fixings. Still haven't eaten dinner yet, because the apt manager is supposed to come by in a bit and fix my bedroom blinds.

I'm a bit cranky, but not overly so -- nothing I can't handle. My reactive airways flared up a little, though -- I've had a semi-persistent cough since I came down off the hill. Hopefully it takes care of itself (but I should still drink water and grab a cough drop, to help it along).

>>>

I missed working out Tuesday. This was entirely my own fault -- I just slacked off. I'm considering trying to get myself up early and do it in the mornings along with my meditation on the theory that if I make it part of my morning routine, I'm more likely to do it and not slack off.

Hm.

-- Des

So yesterday (that's Saturday, for those of you who aren't reading this within the next hour or so), vokzal and I went laser-tagging in Golden Gate Park, of all places.

One of her friends was organising the event, which ended up with something like 50 or so people. There were maybe 6 teams, and we played Capture the Flag, rotating teams throughout the day so each team had about 4 15-minute games.

The location was excellent -- we were in a redwood grove straddling a gully, with bushes and paths going through. There was plenty of cover, lots of interesting terrain, and it was a big enough field that it took a decent amount of time to cross it.

They had headset radios for each team, and several types of serious laser weapons -- from small, short-range (but wider-beam) pistols, to long-range, narrow-beam sniper rifles. All were equipped with laser sights, making it very easy for even a n00b like me to aim. :D (You line up the dot and pull the trigger. The laser beam goes exactly where the dot is.)

Capture the Flag laser tag is very different from your standard melee -- it doesn't matter how many times you die, or how many kills you make. What matters is whether your team captures the opposing flag, which requires teamwork and communication. It was vastly more fun than any previous laser tag experience I've had.

Our team's tactical lead had been a member of the Israeli army at one point, so he was pointing out things that never would have occurred to the rest of us. One of the first things we did was establish radio conventions -- how to talk about things like location, distance, direction, etc. We had common names for various landmarks, and positions, and we spent most of our break time plotting strategy.

At the same time, other teams were much more laid-back -- some had little kids, and were just like, "yeah, charge!" and others (like mine) were more serious, more focused, more coordinated. I think I prefer the serious approach -- the game definitely takes intelligence and skill. I like having to coordinate with team members, work out battle plans, and adjust them on the fly. Just shooting at people holds little appeal for me.

In short, I had an absolute blast, and I'd totally do it again. :D

-- Des

Very quickly, as I'm eating dinner and playing videogames... >.>

Climbed Albany Hill again today -- alternated jogging with running for a half hour (likely more, as I jogged a bit on the way home during cool-down).

Ate an energy bar before leaving work, about an hour before going out. Dinner--well over an hour later--is an egg with lots of bell peppers, a few olives, some bacon and cheese.

I definitely feel like I pushed myself harder today than I have in prior sessions -- and my body seems to be responding well. I was dead tired when I got home, but my mood has been pretty stable. I think the meditation might also be helping there. (I should write a separate post about that, later.)

Alright... back to food! ::NOM:: :E

Edit: I forgot to mention, it's been a week since my last session, due to conflicting events. :/ Consistent schedules are hard to maintain...

-- Des

Dinner (chicken curry + rice) ~1hr prior

Jogging in-place (~10:00) [warm-up]
Sit-ups 50 (3:38) [above ground -- no backrest]
Push-ups ? (10:00) [elbows strictly at sides; 1/2 lever length -- from waist]
Sit-ups 20 (3:08)
Push-ups ? (5:00) [same as above]
Sit-ups 10 (1:30)
Dancing like a crazed squirrel (6:40) [cool-down]

Milk+cookie immediately after (to avoid glucose crash)

Discovered, to my chagrin (but not really surprise) that I can't do full push-ups using just my fore-arms (keeping my elbows strictly at my sides). A full push-up seems to require bringing my shoulders to bear. So I just did them from the waist, which was plenty hard in itself. :p I need to do a better job counting -- I was focusing all my attention on just making the movement correctly. :p

Wrists didn't bother me this time. I guess they've had sufficient time to heal from when I slept funny ... 3 weeks ago? Something like that.

Definitely gonna be sore in my forearms tomorrow. Left moreso than right, but that's not surprising -- my right's been getting a lot of work shifting gears in Shiro. Dunno about abs. I probably could've done more situps if I'd wanted to, but chickened out toward the end and was like, "I want this to be over". :p

The milk+cookie helped somewhat, but I'm definitely still noticing some moodiness creeping in. All you people who can get high from exercising -- you're lucky. I hate being cranky.

That said, I've been doing this for what, a week? (Inconsistently, at that.) Hopefully it will get better.

-- Des

Did 50 situps -- was going to try to do pushups, but my wrist decided that wasn't happening. Walked around upper El Cerrito as a substitute. I mostly felt the situps in my thighs/hips afterward, which makes me think I'm doing something wrong. I definitely felt my abs pulling during, though, so I don't know.

I need to work out a good route if I'm going to do upper EC again. The route I took tonight just wasn't steep enough to make it worthwhile. Albany Hill was much better.

There are some nice neighborhoods relatively close to BART (~10min walk) in that direction, however. No for sale signs, though -- and again, not sure I could afford it. :/

-- Des

Climbed Albany Hill again... it's a nice hill, but it really needs to be bigger. Or I need to find a longer way of getting up there, or something.

It only took me about 15min to climb this time. I had to go part-way down and back up again to get a reasonable workout out of it. But I'm definitely more tired than last time, which is a good thing.

Need to find some upper-body work to do, though, and possibly start carrying some load so as to work my legs a bit more. Also... more than (roughly) once a week would be nice. I was intending to do something Sunday, but was busy with house-hunting and family.

Right then, I need a cookie.

-- Des

Went for a hike around Albany Hill after I got home... lasted about 1:15, with maybe 20 minutes of that actually being strenuous uphill. The rest was an extended warm-up/cool-down, walking at a fast pace. Was mostly cardio -- my legs were plenty strong for the hill; they were tight, but not at all sore. Was definitely taxing my lungs/heart, though.

Got rather light-headed during the uphill bits, probably because I hadn't eaten since lunch. Went through about 16oz of Gatorade on the hike, then several glasses of water and a burrito after I got home.

Not really sore at the moment, and my mood is doing fine. I'm not even particularly tired, an hour afterward. If my feet didn't hurt, I could do it again. It wasn't nearly as intense as Sunday, but I still feel like I got something useful out of it. I'm pretty pleased.

Next time I need to find someplace more strenuous to hike, or go up and down the hill twice. Either way, should push myself harder -- and eat beforehand.

But it's still cool that I have a nice hill, with lots of trees and trails running around it, less than a half-hour walk from my apartment. I actually stumbled across a nice residential neighborhood on the hill -- I'd totally own a house there. There was ample parking, and (as evidenced by my hike) it's a decent walk from BART. (My current apartment is almost too close, honestly.) Too bad none of them were for sale.

-- Des

Seems like every time I have occasion to sit down in front of an LJ window, my mind blanks. Thus, no posts.

I've mostly been amusing myself with little things, lately. Been playing lots of Banjo Kazooie on the 360, visiting friends, having friends visit me, and so on.

dktiger, netolu and crew came up a couple weekends ago for the belly-dance festival in Vallejo. Turns out sezjasaneh's (well, and my) friend Blue was there also... AND dktiger knew her. So that was a pleasant surprise. There was so much pretty-shiny at the festival that my eyes were glazing over. @.@ But dktiger's troupe [is that the right word?] performed admirably -- they were easily some of the best dancers I saw that day.

Last weekend saw me headed up to Sacramento for Avenue Q. I'd really been looking forward to seeing it, and it did not disappoint. The show itself was pretty light on plot -- if you listen to the soundtrack, you'll pick up on perhaps 85% of what's going on -- but the way they wove the songs together worked very well. The show was funny, and it flowed smoothly.

Seems like I make it up to Sac about once a month or so -- and really, that's just about right. I was looking forward to seeing inbredmonkey and darkone238 again. I got plenty of snuggles from both, which always makes me happy.

>>>

I participated in Crossfit this time around, which was... a rather harsh thing to do considering I haven't been doing much of any exercise for the past several months. I want to setup a workout routine that will keep me healthy, help me build strength, etc., and I've been self-flagellating over the fact that I haven't. But Crossfit was a rather unpleasant reminder of why it's so hard for me to keep my motivation, once I do manage to get started on a routine.

It HURTS.

Really, this isn't a big deal. I can deal with physical pain. But the attendant mood swings are much harder. Curling up into a tight ball in a corner somewhere an hour afterward is NOT OK.

To be fair, that's a rather extreme case. Usually, I just get irritable. But between that and the pain (neither of which ever seemed to get better over time, even when I could stick to a schedule), staying motivated was very difficult, to say the least. I'd get sick, or busy, or something... and then that would be the end of it for a while.

I'd like to try again, but not until I have a good understanding of what I was doing wrong. Short of jumping in head-first (joining a gym, hiring a personal trainer, etc.), I'm not sure how to figure that out. And I'm not sure how to schedule activities I can do (like hiking) around work, weekend trips, and the rest of my life. I don't really have any equipment, or space for equipment either.

So if you have ideas, or can offer me suggestions, URLs, etc., I'm all ears.

I know a lot of the issues I've listed above can be worked-around, fixed, or rendered moot. I don't want to use them as excuses -- I want to make it work. But I'm out of ideas on how, and it doesn't help that I don't know the first thing about how to exercise effectively. :/

>>>

This journal is, and always has been primarily about helping me to organize my thoughts, and bounce ideas off/get input from you, dear Reader. I've been doing a horrible job, lately, of using it for this purpose. So going forward, I'm going to try to keep a list, internally, of things I want to write about here. Hopefully this will generate more frequent updates -- my brain could certainly use them, and I assume if you're reading this, you're probably interested as well.

Possible future topics: 2008 year-end reflection (I still haven't done this!), thoughts on work and emotional investment, and house-hunting.

-- Des