Des (deskitty) wrote,

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So I stayed up till 3:30 last night reading Kieran's account of the whole Duncan thing. I did this at Q's suggestion, although I'm sure he probably wasn't intending for me to stay up that late... ;)

First, my LJ memories are horribly out of date. I've been trying to maintain a reasonably current journal, but I've completely neglected the memories. There needs to be some easy way within LogJam of assigning memories as you're writing the entry. Either that or some way of automatically placing entries into the right groups.

Second, his dad ... wow. I think he probably knows a lot of what I need to know. I've been struggling a lot lately with apathy and numbness, and I'm discovering that my initial view that a goal-based life is Bad wasn't entirely correct. In fact, it's more wrong than right. Goals give us a sense of purpose and meaning, even if they're simple, silly things that don't mean much in the "long run".

One needs a sense of internal direction; a general sense of where they're going in life. You can't have a journey without knowing, at least vaguely, where you're going.

So one of my whiteboards has a list of specific goals on it (a la "Finish CPE 480 homework"), along with approximate dates as to when I want to get things done. It's somewhat out-of-date, but it's a start. Accounting and administrative tasks have never been a strong point in my own life.

As I look at the list, I see that most of the stuff on it is school related. I don't think, for me, that's a particularly healthy thing. But I'm not sure what else to do at this point. I think perhaps I should sit down and figure that out.

I'm also somewhat concerned because I'm taking mostly computer classes next quarter... concerned, but not really surprised. I'm concerned because some of that involves learning things I don't particularly want to learn (a la CPE 315), and because I think I need to start looking for things to do (in general, not necessarily career-wise) other than computers.

We'll see. I may sit down this evening and play with my schedule and my whiteboard. In the meantime, I have some things I need to get done before I head to school.

-- Des

 12:09:05 up 15 days, 18:26,  4 users,  load average: 0.00, 0.00, 0.00

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    If you want to know what my life is like, look no further. Really, that's all there is to it. -- Des

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