Des (deskitty) wrote,

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Like a yo-yo...

Today has been a day of extremes...this morning, I was incredibly anxious, awaiting my MDS interview. Afterwards, I was feeling good and optimistic about the whole thing. Tonight, after I get home, I pretty much collapse into a state of not wanting to do anything, because none of it matters in the long run anyway. After I got off the phone with my parents, I was happy again...because getting a job makes practical sense (and my parents are always the ones to look at the practical side of things).

I was intending to go to bed at 11 tonight...but for one reason or another, I'm still awake. I've been getting 6 or fewer hours of sleep a night (and doing this for the past two weeks), why, I don't know. I don't usually do this unless something is bugging me...I think "something", in this case, is at least partially money.

kion has been kind enough to host debaucheries, and take us out to dinner numerous times...but in some ways I feel badly because I don't have enough in my budget to fend for myself at these occasions.

I also need to be thinking about buying a new car at some point in the near future (certainly before this summer), which generally involves lots of money. Nevermind that I like having extra money to do things like buy CDs, DVDs and ThinkGeek T-shirts.

So there are some pretty good reasons for me to get a job...and if/when I actually do get it, it will be a weight off my shoulders, so to speak. I want to be able to pull at least some of my own weight...right now I'm completely dependent on my parents for money, which is nice in some ways, but frustrating in others. It's not like they begrudge me the money, or have objections to me going out to eat once in a while...but they are paying for my apartment, my DSL, my gas, my food, ... you get the idea.

Damn, this wasn't all supposed to be just about money, but that's how it turns out, and I'm too tired/lazy/whatever to write anything else right now. (Actually, more lazy than tired, but still.)


-- Des

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